Monday, May 19, 2008

Pets and Guild Wars

I currently have three animals in my flat--a dog named Bruno, and two mischievous kittens named Midori and Toru.

All three have their personal quirks--Bruno knows when it's time to take a bath and will hide under the couch, Midori knows when it's time to eat and will constantly try to jump up my legs to reach the food I'm preparing, and Toru... well, he likes to eat fingers.

P and I are big Guild Wars geeks. We love the game, and even though work and other matters take us away from it for a while, we still go back again and again. We're such geeks we've even used the game to describe my pets.

In the game, there are also pets that characters can tame and use in combat. These pets have their respective qualities and damage-dealing abilities.

My own pets also have their own abilities, as we have identified using the Guild Wars guide.


She's very sweet, people-friendly, cuddly, and TERRIBLY CLINGY. She's harder to take off than industrial Velcro. She will jump on you while you pee in the bathroom, jump on your shoulder and stick her butt in your face while you watch TV on the couch, and hang off your arm while you try to prepare their food in peace.

And because she is still affected by gravity, she will fall if she does not have anything to hook her claws on. Unfortunately for me, most of the time it's my skin her claws dig in. People can tell if you have a cat at home when you go around sporting little red slashes on your hands, arms and legs, with some healing, some still bloody, and some already scabbed and itchy.

For this reason, we have determined that she has SLASHING DAMAGE. Painful, quick, and difficult to avoid. You never know when and where she's going to strike.


Toru is just as sweet and playful as Midori. He is also very curious about her, though she will claw his eyes out as soon as he tries to approach her. Toru is also a little dumb; he doesn't know how to jump up to the washing machine using my bike's wheel (they stand next to each other) and has to cry out pitifully before I pick him up and place him there to eat. Nor does he know how to use the freaking litter pan, despite my many attempts to place him there when I see him start to claw the floor.

I need patience.

But what he is, is friendly. He immediately took a liking to Bruno, and the two can play with each other all day, with Bruno giving up first (must be the age--he did just turn 3, after all). He is also very talkative, and will constantly meow till I can't take it anymore and submit to his whims, which usually means carrying him to wherever he wants to go. Sometimes it's so bad I have a hard time sleeping at night because he also wants to jump up on the bed and--GET THIS--eat my fingers. Or toes, if he can't reach my fingers.

P was the unlucky recipient of his playbites when he slept over the other night on the couch. The next morning, groggy and ill-tempered, P told me how Toru meowed the whole night and tried to jump up on the couch. Then when P put up a pillow as a wall, Toru jumped up on the couch's arm.

And according to P: "di mo ko naririning mura ko ng mura nung isang gabi." Poor P.

Based on his actions, we have determined that Toru has PIERCING DAMAGE. Toru's bites are quite painful, but can be dealt with easily with a sharp tap on the head and a firm NO. He still hasn't quite got it, though, but I'll give it time.


So where does all that leave Bruno?

Well, we think Bruno is a HEARTY pet. He is an active dog, eats a lot, and is quite on the heavy side. He also once attempted to jump down from a 3-foot tall grocery cart, fell on his face, and promptly walked away. And so far, Toru's claws have not dented his thick fur.

Yes, he is quite hearty indeed.

I currently have my hands full, and my pockets rapidly emptying, so I don't think I can take on another pet. But when I do, I expect it will also have qualities we can identify using our Guild Wars knowledge.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

interesting viewpoint :)